A sweet welcome home
I'll never forget bringing my second daughter home from the hospital to meet her big sister. It was such an exciting moment that I had dreamed about for months (9 to be exact). What followed was a painfully shy hello, followed by a few tears and then very little interest.
Let's be honest, introducing the newest member of the family to your older child can sometimes feel like navigating uncharted waters.
That’s because you are!! As a mom myself I'm here to assure you that this journey, while occasionally bumpy, can also be an amazing bonding experience for your family!
Obviously, it's so crucial to prepare your older kiddos for the new baby.
This is a big change in their life and will shake up their world quite a bit.
But here's the good news, preparation is key (and you’re already starting that process by reading this blog!)
Let's talk specifics. What can you do NOW to prepare for the new baby?
Books
Start by reading books that talk about siblings and new babies. "I'm a Big Sister" or "I'm a Big Brother" by Joanna Cole and “When You're Older” by Sophie Laguna are great options. They beautifully illustrate the ups and downs of having a new sibling.
Let the Older Sibling Help Prepare
As you prepare the baby's room (or maybe just get some clothes ready if a nursery is further down on your to-do list), let your older child be involved! Allow them to pick out some nursery decorations, an outfit, or a special gift for their new sibling. This involvement can help them feel like they're a crucial part of this new chapter.
Keep Communication Open
Leading up to the birth, and in the weeks following, it’s important to maintain open lines of communication. Ask your child how they're feeling, let them express any worries or fears, and let them know it's okay to be nervous.
Let the Older Sibling Help After Baby Arrives
After the baby arrives, it's a whole new ball game. During this time, it's helpful to foster interaction between your older child and their new sibling. Let your older child "help" with the baby — maybe they can pick out the baby's outfit for the day, or sing them a lullaby, or simply talk to the baby. This can help them form a bond with the baby, and feel included in this new phase of your family's life.
Pre-arrange one on one time
But remember, amid all this, feelings of jealousy might creep in. They may act in out in ways you've never seen before, because they feel they need the attention. It’s essential to reassure your older child that they're still loved just as much as before. Maybe you can arrange for some one-on-one time with them - a special movie night or a picnic in the park. It doesn’t have to be grand, what matters is spending quality time with them.
For my oldest daughters when my son came home, I scheduled gymnastics and swim lessons with them once a week. I called Grandma up and she agreed to one on one time with the baby while I got time with just my older girls. I know they loved having my just to themselves and not preoccupied by the baby like I was at home. If you're in the Boston area, I always recommend Broderick's Gym in Hyde Park.
Keep Their Routine
Ultimately, keep in mind that as parents, you're their compass in this new territory. It's important to keep as much of their normal routine as possible. Whether it's their beloved bedtime story, or that funny face you pull while having dinner, keeping some things the same can provide them with comfort. And remember, every child is different and will react differently. It's about guiding them through this process with love, understanding, and patience. Ultimately in time a sibling is one of the greatest gifts you can offer them, a playmate for life!
I hope this helped offer some ideas on how to make this transition a little more smoothly.
If you’re looking for a photographer to capture these first moments with the older sibling and new baby - I’m here for you!
Click here to see my newborn photography or, maybe you’d like to learn more about hiring a newborn photographer
